10 Brutally Honest Tips for Starting Your Own Business (From Someone Who’s Been There)

From someone who learned the hard way—and wouldn’t have it any other way.

Starting a business looks sexy on Instagram. In reality? It’s caffeine-fueled nights, awkward product pivots, and repeatedly screaming, "Why is no one buying this?!"

Here’s the good news: You don’t have to have it all figured out. Here’s the better news: I’ve done the hard part (aka failing, flailing, and figuring it out), so now I’m sharing the best tips I’ve learned—no fluff, no hustle cult BS.

1. Perfection Isn’t Real. Just Start.

If you wait until everything’s in place, you’ll still be waiting in 2040. I’ve redone my website 100 times, changed taglines, scrapped products, added new ones, and redesigned my logo twice. Spoiler: that’s normal. The beauty is in the process, not the polished launch. Start messy. Adjust as you go.

2. Passion Helps—But It’s Not Everything.

If there’s something you’ve always wanted to do, go for it. But if not, don’t overthink it. You can build a business around something you like and believe in, without it being your soul’s purpose. Do your research. Find something with decent margins, low startup costs, and growth potential. You're not marrying it—you’re testing it.

3. Define Success Early (and Write It Down).

You will have highs and lows. Like... months-with-no-sales lows. Define what success looks like for you. Maybe it’s launching. Maybe it’s your first sale. Maybe it’s hitting 5k in 90 days. Whatever makes you say, “Damn, I did it”—name it, write it down, and keep it close. You’ll need it on the days your impostor syndrome is screaming louder than your sale notifications.

4. Stay Flexible.

You’ll love ideas that your audience won’t care about. It happens. If a rose gold jar isn’t landing, but silver’s flying off the shelves, pivot. Don’t lose your vision, but keep your ears open. Feedback is gold, even when it bruises your ego.

5. Know Your Audience (and Don’t Take Everyone’s Advice).

Not everyone’s going to love your stuff. That’s a feature, not a bug. Define your audience clearly—like “Elder millennials who love candles, nostalgia, and unfiltered honesty.” (Hi.) When people give opinions, know whose matter and whose don’t.

6. Do the Heavy Lifting Upfront.

Yes, start. But also—get your house in order. What are your core values? What’s your brand ethos? Why do you exist? This is your foundation. And if your idea feels too big, trim it down. Get focused. Get spicy. Make your POV slap. It needs to be cohesive and make sense to anyone you pitch it to. You can always expand later.

7. Handle the Legal Sh*t.

Websites need privacy policies and terms. You might owe taxes in multiple states. Should you be an LLC, an S-Corp, or stay sole prop? Pay for a consult. The legal stuff isn’t fun, but it’s cheaper than lawsuits and IRS letters.

8. Your Friends & Family Might Not Show Up.

Oof, this one hurts—but it’s true. The people closest to you won’t always be your biggest cheerleaders. Sometimes your best customer is someone you haven’t seen since 8th grade. Don’t take it personally. No one will care about your business as much as you do. Ever. That’s not rude—it’s reality.

9. Learn to Sell (Without Being Super Cringe).

You’ve gotta shake the trees. People won’t magically know what you’re doing unless you tell them. But here’s the trick—don’t lead with “buy my product.” Lead with what’s in it for them. Think FAB: Feature, Application, Benefit. What is it? What does it do? Why should they care?

10. Build a Business That Fits Your Life.

Want to build an empire? Hell yes. Want something that gives you flexibility and peace? Also valid. You are the architect. Design your business to serve your life, not the other way around. That’s the whole damn point.

Final thought? Start scrappy. Stay curious. Be relentless. And when it gets hard (because it will), light a candle, take a breath, and remember: you’re building something real. And that’s already more than most people dare to do.

Love, Vanessa

xxx