What I’ve Learned About Working for Myself (So Far)

There’s this moment I had—probably after yet another late-night strategy session that could’ve been an email—where I realized something: I was working my ass off to build someone else’s dream.

And honestly? That didn’t sit right with me.

So I quit.

I walked away from the corporate world to bet on myself. And I wish I could say I felt confident and cool and ready—but the truth? I was equal parts liberated and terrified. I was worried I’d fail. I was worried I’d blow it. But underneath it all, I felt something I hadn’t in a long time: in control.

For the first time in forever, I could put myself and my family first. Whether this business soared or flopped spectacularly, I knew I was finally building something that was mine.

Lesson #1: You’re It. All of It.

Here’s the biggest surprise no one warned me about: when you work for yourself, it’s all you. No manager. No safety net. No “quick Slack consult.” Just you, your gut, and maybe a Google search spiral at 2 a.m.

And while I’d assumed that making candles would be the easy part—spoiler alert—it’s not. Good candles are part chemistry, part patience, part “wait, what’s the flashpoint of this oil again?” And math. So. Much. Math.

Oddly enough, the part I thought would be a challenge—customer experience and product design—turned out to be a total joy. The ideas just keep coming. Some brilliant. Some…ehhh, character-building. But the flow? It’s real.

Lesson #2: Burnout Looks Different Now

A “normal” day starts and ends with family. Always.In between? It’s a mix of admin, socials (I’m loving Threads), making and shipping orders, brainstorming, working on marketing strategy, and sometimes squeezing in a class to level up.

Oh, and I make time for me. Kickboxing, pottery, getting dirty in the garden—whatever feeds me. Because one of the perks of being your own boss is realizing that if everything doesn’t get done today? Cool. Candles are not a life-or-death situation. We’re not in the ER here, we’re in the aromatherapy aisle.

Lesson #3: The Self Is the Business

The real growth hasn’t just been about sales. It’s been personal.

I knew I could do this. I just didn’t feel it until I actually started doing it. Working for myself made me realize where I shine, where I struggle, and just how much I’ve learned from the people I’ve known over the years. Those relationships? Gold.

And also—pro tip—humor saves everything.

Failure? Inevitable. But how fast you get back up? That’s the game-changer.

Lesson #4: The Highs Make the Lows Worth It

The valleys are real. The “what the hell am I doing” moments? Also real. But going back to my old job? Not even a little tempting. That chapter is closed, and I’m fully booked in the “entrepreneur” section now.

My favorite moment so far? When my kids started coming up with marketing ideas and proudly talking about “our business” to their friends and teachers. It’s more than just a candle—it’s ours. That’s cool as hell.

Unexpected joys? Orders from long-lost friends. Comments from influencers or brands I admire. And realizing, damn, just being me is actually pretty awesome—and people connect with it.

So… Thinking About Quitting?

DO IT. Yes, I’m yelling. Because it’s worth it.

You don’t know what you’re capable of until you try. You’ll find a community. You’ll surprise yourself. You’ll fail and laugh and cry and keep going.

But please—for the love of scented wax—outsource accounting. I wish someone had screamed that at me sooner. It’s miserable.

Working for yourself isn’t easy. But it’s honest. And it’s yours.

And if you ever need someone to cheer you on? You know where to find me. Love,

Vanessa xxx